monk who is expected to obey has permission to respond with reasons that it might be difficult or impossible to carry out commands: “he should choose the appropriate moment and explain patiently to his superior why he cannot perform the task. This he ought to do without pride, obstinacy, or refusal” (RB 68.2–3). This would have been a better approach for the pastor from Maine to have taken with my student; it’s certainly a healthy model for our parent-child and employer-employee relationships. After